ghostcrows:

warning to all beverage drinkers

condensention will make your fucking cup stick to the, coaster and the coaster will get glued to the cup from water particles. VERY DANGEROUS. please wear a hard hat and go online to webkinz.com and spin the wheel of wow to get a fun prize, every day daily

fieldbears:

the-haiku-bot:

gitrog:

I’m setting my trap, to catch the damn haiku bot. Quiet! Here it comes.

I’m setting my trap,

to catch the damn haiku bot.

Quiet! Here it comes.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

stroebe2:

amvs:

amvs:

amvs:

fat little girls deserve the world tbh society is so traumatizing to them

fat little girls can do whatever they want forever actually. btw. it’s law now.

if a fat little girl punches her bullies straight in the nose that’s direct action and also a win for feminism

popepauljohn:

whatlucidity:

artenega:

shiftythrifting:

ah yes i was looking for a soap dispenser labeled “ketchup” with a picture of grapes

I really want this bottle in my bathroom. I’d place it next to matching decorative soaps and towels as if it seems like it fits, but I’ll actually fill the thing up with ketchup. So when I have guests over and they decide to use the bathroom, they will see this bottle and have a moment of cognitive dissonance, “This [Soap Bottle] in the [Bathroom] is labelled [Ketchup], but surely it must dispense [Soap] instead of [Ketchup] despite the label saying [Ketchup] right?” and then let them have a moment of realization followed by abject horror as they pump viscous ketchup all over their hands instead of soap

wytchlyng:

curlyhumility:

youcantseebutimmakingaface:

I ended up having a really interesting conversation with some people at the bus stop today. They were getting out of some sort of ‘clean and sober’ meeting and had starting saying how they were so bored because they didn’t have anything to do, and had to stay at home because all their old friends would pull them back. So I said something like, ‘So this is the time to do all the stuff your parents told you they didn’t have money/time for!’

“Whatcha mean?”

“You know, like when you were five and you REALLY wanted to have that toy or do that thing and you were like, ‘Please mom please I gotta have this I gotta go do this’ and they went ‘Hell no you think I’m paying for that do you want to goddamn EAT?’ “

And this light went on in their eyes. The lady is going to go check thrift stores for an Easybake Oven and I told her about Wilton cake decorating classes. The dude is going to Griffith Park and ride horses, because, ‘I always wanted to be a cowboy, and you can’t drink when you’re on a horse ‘cause you’ll fucking die!’

Fuck it. This is what being an adult is. Sure it’s bills and work and relationships, but damn it, it’s also time to do the things you LIKE.

I signed up for a free class/lecture on Water Gardens. I’m going. It’s time.

Jill. Jill you are wonderful.

LOOK IT’S TRUE

i foster homeless bunny rabbits and eat lunchables whenever i want